The radiotherapy has started this week, and so far she has had alot of tiredness and nausea, so the it hasnt gone well. We didnt expect it to be quite so tough so soon, but apparently the location of targeting the liver so close to the bowel makes it tricky. The specialists had given us the potential side effects, and these were on there, however like most people we had kind of thought it wouldnt start so soon. Kind of thought it would be a cumulative effect as opposed to instantaneous.
Obviously this will make the remaining trips to the hospital much harder, as now the psychological aspect will manifest itself. Already she has problems with certain foods and clothing associated with previous trips, and this is only going to make it worse. We have to ensure that certain containers or bottles are not around when she is in the room, as she will almost have physical response. I’m not a scientist, and so struggle to understand the full concept, but can understand on a basic level.
What has also made it harder to accept has been a couple of social events we have attended recently. One was a party on Saturday night, the other a school awards ceremony today. Luckily we could both get there, but due to the current situation were not able to fully enjoy the events. Saturday night was particularly hard, as everyone there was dressed to the nines, drinking and chatting away, while we were able to talk to a few people before my wife got too tired and had to sit in a corner, before leaving early. It doesnt feel fair, that after so long of us having this diagnosis and sentence hanging over us, we are still dealing with it, while the world has now come out of a pandemic and is coming back to life.
Interestingly, there is a theory that post the Spanish Flu, people were determined to let their hair down and enjoy life to the max, and that this led to the ‘Roaring 20s’, and that we may see something similar now (cost of living crisis allowing), and I did feel that at the party we attended that was the case. It thus felt very frustrating to not be able to do that, and also have the knowledge that for us life hasnt changed back.
Next round is tomorrow, and this should be quicker as they know the dose to give. But lets hope the side effects dont build on today.