It has been half term here, and as my wife and I are both celebrating our 50th birthdays (mines later this week so there is still time to send a present or buy me a pint, wink, wink) we managed a few days in Madrid and Cordoba, before she and my son visited her Dad for his birthday. Our daughter is now at Uni, so sadly had to miss out.
Madrid was good, reasonably cheap, and plenty to see. I loved the Real Madrid stadium tour, especially seeing the old kits, and trophies. The stadium feels compact inside, but the seats head up quite high. It was very impressive, but not sure what it would have been like the next day when they lost 4-0 to Barcelona.
The boots below belonged to Di Stefano. I suspect modern players must be thankful for changes in technology judging by these. Even my thirteen year old son knew who they belonged to, I am glad he knows his football history.
I also enjoyed the Prado museum – I was keen to see the Bosch and Goya paintings, but everything else was amazing. My favourite is Saturn by Goya, painted late in his life, when he was in his black phase. This shows Saturn devouring his son, fearful of being usurped by the child. It is a terrifying image, but one I find fascinating. Not sure if that says more about me than it should. I now have a copy on my office wall, to remind me as I hit 50 that younger people are always coming to take my place. I wont eat them though. At least not all of them.
We also caught a bullet train to Cordoba, which was phenomenal. So quick and comfortable. Plus drinks on board were cheap. In fact, the whole trip showed how pubs and bars rip us off here in the UK- 3 euros 50 for a glass of wine, gin being poured by sight and beer in a can at the train station for 2 euros 35. A great way to relax! The view was fabulous, and the ease of getting on and off was great. Nothing like the train service in the UK. Even having three cases and only two of us able to carry them wasnt a hassle.
Cordoba has plenty of Roman sights, and a UNESCO world heritage site of a mosque and cathedral, while we also went to see the horse display. I was a little underwhelmed at this, however did enjoy the cathedral. It was a massive complex, with history going back centuries. I loved the Roman ruins dotted around, even the remains of a villa under our hotel.
So it was a fun trip in the most part. But the main thing I want to address is how tough it can be for us as a family to travel, and specifically the challenges of travelling with terminal cancer. And I get that this sounds like whining from someone in the priviledged position of having been able to travel and have a holiday.
I have discussed before about things we have lost (https://mywifehascancer.blog/archives/615), and travelling is one of them. I used to love exploring cities on foot, finding hidden gems, spending time at cafes and bars with my wife. I now have to do this solo. The plain act of travelling to the airport, on the plane and the other end, even with assistance will mean my wife will be too tired to do anything for the first day.
A delay on the plane can mean her having to sit for longer, which causes major pain in her stomach. And we cant travel more than a couple of hours anyway, as travel insurance prohibits the destination. Insurance can be probitively expensive anyway, so we cant always afford to make a trip. The years before cancer we were able to travel far and wide, and enjoyed flying to Florida or the Far East, family events we now know we were very lucky to afford and make.
Eating out can be a challenge. We had a meal out, on her birthday, to a restaurant she had specifically chosen, only for something to trigger her and mean that there was a quick run to the thankfully close bathroom with sick down the front of her dress. It is humiliating and depressing for her. We then had the slow walk back to the hotel trying to guide her through throngs of people out for an evening, their tables full of food and drink, not noticing the terminally sick women being almost carried home. Everywhere we ate, we had to check the toilet location, ease of getting to them, the contents of the menu and the type of room and chairs.
The cost when on a trip is higher as well. We need to use taxis to get to places, otherwise my wife would not be able to go anywhere. Her walking amounts to a couple of hundreds yards in reality, before she gets over tired, so by using transport at least she can see things.
Anywhere loud and busy is out of the question as well. Airports can be a disorientating environment. Her hearing is weak, and she has no peripheral sight on the left side, so any location where people are milling around, walking fast and chatting, with music playing will be tough for her to navigate. Numerous times both her and abroad she has been knocked almost over. I have taken to standing fast and hard behind her, almost like a blocker in American football, using my size to get in peoples way. I am big and not afraid of getting people upset these days. They can put up with a bit of a delay to compensate for what my wife has to navigate.
I miss the days before all this. Sometimes you realise how lonely the world can be when you are unable to do much, and when travelling and visiting places here or abroad, I see how cut off my wife is. So many things out there that she cannot physically do, so many places she would love to visit but can through distance, lack of disabled facilities, even lack of comfortable seating (we have to take a cushion in a bag everywhere we go). These things are isolating and demeaning, and impact so many people.
Even at home she is isolated. Since she got home from visiting her dad, she hasnt left the house in two days, and spent alot of that time in bed. The rest of us can leave and do things, and really have to to keep our household moving. It is another thing that really isnt fair.
I want to finish with this tune. I am loving the new Cure album (see below), and this may the emotional centre of the 8 songs. A cry for a lost brother, this has really struck home.
Keeping Track
New music listened to:
- The Cure have released their new album Songs of a Lost World, and I am loving it. Very like Disintegration, with 8 tracks of majestic melancholy music.
- Julian Cope has released Friar Tuck – an album of similar songs to Skellington, and one that will fly under the radar. If you love him like I do, you will like it, but if you have lost track over the last two decades, I would advice caution.
- At the opposite end is the new David Gilmour album Luck and Strange. As you would expect this sounds like late period Pink Floyd, which again is no bad thing.
- Paul Heaton was the star of Glastonbury for me, and his stance on ticket pricing and fans is to be applauded. His new album The Mighty Several has plenty of sing along tunes, especially Fish and Chip Supper (or Chippy tea as my son called it)
- Heavy Lifting by the MC5 is a sad addition to their cannon, following the death of their final two original members. I love the band, and this has its moments. A grower though I suspect.
- Finally I am enjoying Pixies The Night the Zombies came – not as good as Trompe Le Monde (yeah, I think that is their peak), but continues their run post reformation.
Books Finished
Finally I completed the Greg Jenner book Ask A Historian. I really enjoyed the concept, and found some interesting titbits of knowledge.
Thanks
Thanks for reading, and if you like what I have written, maybe consider giving a tip in thanks.
