I haven’t written anything for a while as I haven’t had the motivation. As in the rest of the world, things have gone really scary and surreal. Last week we started quarantining ourselves, keeping the kids home, not going out. I am working from home.

The corona virus is really scary – my wife is very high risk of infection, and really worrying issues if she catches it. Everything has closed down, no more trial, in fact no more hospital visits. I have a feeling of impending doom a lot, not knowing what is going to happen. We are trying to make things work at home, keeping the children occupied, but it is hard. They are young, they are scared, and the longer this goes on the worse it will be mentally.

The media doesn’t help – lots of footage of empty shop shelves – what is with that. A great deal of ignorant arseholes clearing the shelves of items, that will no doubt go to waste. For most people if you are sensible, you can go to the shops but use social distance – for us there is a clear risk of that simple activity. But we didn’t stock pile. I don’t need 100 toilet rolls and piles of hand soaps. I cant even get tonic for my G&T!

Our leaders don’t seem to be very clear about what to do – keep away from the pub, but we wont close it. Don’t be in groups with other people, but we will keep the parks open. We are led by idiots at times.

And of course the mental toll. My daughter had had a cold, no temperature or other symptoms of the virus, but every time you get a slight tickle in your throat or headache you start to worry. I read the symptoms on line, and had to take a while convincing my self I just had a cold. And then not sleeping means you have a constant head ache.

I will try to keep more up to date going forward, but I suspect our news wont have much happening – at least I hope not.

For now, all I can end with is a plea – stay in your house, don’t go out, wash your hands, don’t be a dick. Not for you (you may be fine), but my for my wife.

And one last thing – Kenny Rogers was a dude, whatever you think (and if you don’t agree you are wrong)

Home again

My wife is home and tired now. Frustrated with everything. They may go for another round of treatment, as by using steroids and antihistamines they can suppress the bodies reaction to the drugs. It was this that caused her to have a reaction yesterday. Apparently it is known in the second round as your body recognised what is coming and says no way.

We do have the feeling of why. Why does this keep happening, why can’t we catch a break. I have said before how I wish this was over at times, and yesterday is a prime example. We are tired of the rounds of hospitals and tests and drugs and doctors.

But for now we go again. I don’t even know if we are better or worse off than this time yesterday. In a few months we may be told, but for now we will have to keep doing as we are.

Back to life, back to reality

Things slowly started to get better with time. My wife was brought out of sedation, and over the days was more responsive, eating solid food and drinking bottled water. The children visited a few times and after two weeks or so, she was moved out of ICU.

I then had a battle with insurance – as she had come in through A&E, it was harder to get her moved to a room with a bed, rather than a ward. Anyone who has met my wife will know she is very particular, and having noise and movement around her didn’t help her mood, or aide her recovery. Thankfully everyone played ball, and within a few days she was moved to the Marsden in Sutton, closer to home.

I’m not going to go into too much detail of the remaining few weeks – that isn’t the point of this. The immediate threat was over, now we had to deal with the recovery, which was slow, but after 5 weeks in hospital, she was able to come home.

But it was a very different person who came home – after leaving the home she had had near total major organ failure, a stroke, lost sight in the left side, and was now dependant on even more drugs. And the toll on the rest of us was hard – we had been planning a holiday, and now had to increase the care around the house. We had had relatives staying with us constantly – and that causes strains. We appreciate their help, but sometimes need to be able to close the door on them! I hadn’t coped well with the stress, and neither had my mother in law, which meant things were not easy.

So where are we now, nearly a year on from that momentous few weeks? Thankfully my wife is slowly getting better – the steroids have decreased, however the eyesight still isn’t fully back. There are improvements, but not enough to drive. We have to be aware of any small slight illness – a cold for you and me, might be something more sinister for her. Never again will we leave things, and discount them as not serious.